Macro Blog 1 - Like Going to McDonald's for a Salad

Music is a very common interest in people. It helps one relax and have fun, so long as the person enjoys it. People have different taste in music, but when it comes down to what the best recent songs are, people are generally interested, regardless of genre. I can remember watching the best and latest music videos on MTV, which stands for Music Television. Makes sense right? Well, nowadays MTV shows nothing but reality television. I think there are two solutions here: MTV should air all of its reality shows on a new network made specifically for them, or MTV should change its name to RTV, which sounds ridiculous but that's precisely what this is: ridiculous. People should expect to experience music when they turn to the Music Television Channel, not stories about teenage mothers. It's quite pointless, going someplace only to receive something unorthodox to the standards of said place. It's like going to McDonald's for a salad. McDonald's is a very popular fast food restaurant known for its greasy burgers. Why would someone who wants to eat healthy go to McDonald's and order a salad? Why not go somewhere that actually promotes healthy dining? Well, people should go to MTV and "order" the music, not the reality television. That should be "ordered" elsewhere. I suppose the new reality shows must get better ratings and more views, but then the name of the channel is unrelated and thus should either be changed or should bring music back and move the reality to another channel. I am a fan of at least one of the reality shows, and I think they should definitely continue to air, I just don't think MTV is where they should be.

Trinket 1, Day 6 - PATA

Good evening. My name is Phil McClain and I am a representative of the PATA, or People Against Toy Abuse. Now, toy abuse may sound ridiculous but in reality, it is quite serious. Toys are found everyday tossed onto sidewalks, cast into local woods, and even deteriorating in dump sites. These toys that have once brought smiles onto the faces of every child that has played with them are now shunned from society as garbage. Today, are main victim is Seaweed the Otter. Though she is a toy and cannot speak, she has quite a tale that we will be sharing with you today. Seaweed was once a beloved toy, assembled as part of the Beanie Baby Collection and sold to one of the millions of children excited over the new craze. But after the years passed and the child grew tired of Seaweed, she was sold to a complete stranger at a yard sale. Her new owner was not one that favored Beanie Babies. No, it was the owner's dog that loved Seaweed. It would chew her up everyday, until the very fabric was soaked in its entirety and the stitching was becoming undone. After that, Seaweed was replaced by a new doll to be abused in the same way, while Seaweed made her way to the town dump. She was rotting there until we were able to rescue her. She is currently in the process of recovering, having her stitching redone and such. However, she will never be the same. Please, for the sake of Seaweed and all toys out there, love and cherish them as long as you can, until you can give them to another deserving family.

Trinket 1, Day 5 - The Otter Guys

In the most dangerous lake in the world, nobody fights crime like those guys. And then, there are the otter guys. From the directors of Step BrOtters, Atlantic Ocean Pictures presents the hilarious tale of Detective Blake Denzir, a dedicated accountant who prefers to stay in the office, and Detective Sherry Quinton, a cop yearning to return to the action around her but instead is stuck with Blake as her partner in the office. This summer, watch and laugh your hearts out as these two unlikely heroes in the Animal Detective Agency step up to their biggest break yet...but things don't go exactly as planned. Seaweed the Otter stars as Sherry in...

"I'm a penguin, you gotta let me fly!"
"Pick another bird. Penguins, they don't fly Sherry! They don't, do they?"
"Just let him have it captain."

The Otter Guys. This film is not yet rated.

Note: The information on this page was based off of Columbia Picture's The Other Guys.

Trinket 1, Day 4 - Amazing Offer!

Attention people of the world! Have you ever been overcome with so much boredom that it practically drives you insane? Have you ever felt like there is absolutely no one in the world that can ever truly understand who you are? Well, we've got the answer to your prayers! Introducing, Seaweed the Otter! This little fuzzy buddy is everything you could ever want in a toy and more. You can hug it, you can squeeze it, you can even play catch with it! The adventures you'll have are endless! You can never outgrow Seaweed the Otter. A cushion to sleep the night away as a toddler or a best friend to have heart to heart conversations with as a young adult. This toy is for everyone, boys and girls! Get yours for only $19.95! But wait, order within the next ten minutes and you'll also receive Kenny the Kangaroo! That's right, all the fun of Australia packed into another plush toy of your very own, FREE! So that's Seaweed the Otter AND Kenny the Kangaroo, a $40 value for only $19.95! Call Now!

Trinket 1, Day 3 - A Day in the Studio

"Alright, let's do this y'all.
My name is Seaweed
and I'm the freshest of otters.
There's no one better than me
when it comes to being a blogger.
I bench three hundred and three,
don't even need a spotter.
I move so magically,
not talking Harry Potter.
Yeah, I'm a sight to see,
I'm getting hotter and hotter.
Don't like the way I speak?
I'll blow you out of the water!"

"Alright, I think we've heard enough. Come on out of the studio now."

"So, how did I do?"

"...Listen, Seaweed was it? I feel like you have the passion for music, and your rap was alright, but I don't think you're quite what we're looking for."

"I don't understand. The ad required someone between the ages of 8 and 14 who can act and sing and I feel I meet those requirements."

"The thing is, this is for a Kidz Bop commercial."

"...So?"

"We were kind of looking for human kids, not otters."

"Oh..."

Trinket 1, Day 2 - Famous Relative

Hi. My name is Seaweed Otter. Though I am a mammal, I spend much of my time in the water. Whether I'm scavenging for seaweed or lounging in an octopus' garden, you can most likely find me in the water. Most people I meet often confuse me for a beaver. I'd like to take the time to point out that I am definitely NOT a beaver, nor would I ever like to become one. Beavers are so very different from us otters, I don't understand how we get confused for each other. Now a squirrel, I can understand. I mean, my figure practically screams "squirrel." In fact, my distant cousin is a squirrel. Her name is Sandy Cheeks. She spends all her time in the water, too. She's absolutely nuts, but whenever I tell that to people they must mishear me, because they go right ahead and whisper that I'm nuts. I am clearly not, but it doesn't bother me. Anyways it was very nice talking to you, Mr. Coconut.

Trinket 1, Day 1 - The Otter

In my hands, I hold an otter belonging to The Beanie Babies Collection. Her name is Seaweed and she enjoys eating seaweed. She is currently gnawing on a fine piece of seaweed, nibbling at it with greed. My reflection is cast back at me as I stare into her beady, little eyes. An extravagant strip of white ribbon acts quite nicely as her scarf, proving that Seaweed is an otter of luxury. Her soft skin sends sensations throughout the spine, and her tail, as beautiful as it is, is designed to smite any opponent that is foolish enough to provoke her in her natural habitat.